complication of the simplicity

Ever tried stopping to look back at the past few years of your life and wonder why at that particular point in time did you make that particular decision? Or as the current living standards and styles go, perhaps I shall have to rephrase my question to "Ever had the time to slow down and stop for even that minute or second to do the above mentioned?" To tell the truth, I never did have the chance to do so until the last few months of total break that is still ongoing now. And,there have been many of such cases whereby looking back now, I would always think to myself, if I had the perspective I have now at the time, maybe I would have made a different decision, or then again would I?

Life, according to the limited perspective that I posses now is one weird teacher. A teacher that teaches through trial and error, a teacher that throws you only questions with Choice A or Choice B and asks for an answer without ever telling you which is right or wrong, in fact I really doubt this teacher actually has a supposedly correct answer for the questions it churns out. And yet, believe it or not, its always through all these multuple choice questions that we best learn, that we best discover what lies ahead of us and whether we make a right or wrong choice we still get to move on to the next question. Sounds familiar? Yep, isn't this the way things goes in this one kind of storybook we used to play with when we were young and we get to make a choice on behalf of the character every few pages and every answer lead to a different questions and there are many kinds of ending to that one story according to our choices.

In fact, if we really think about it, our life is just that kind of storybook that gets acted out in real life and us being the character and the only difference is that unlike the story we can't go oh, I don't like this choice after all, let's redo it over again. And perhaps this difference is the way to live our life, make every single choice with the point in mind that there would be no way for regret and going back again. And the key to making every choice might just be as simple and cliche as to follow your heart and go through it without any slighest grumble and looking back and sighing.

Think, if we think our lives are hard to lead, are we just complicating the simplest matters because if I did not remember wrongly, we all did pretty well when we were playing with the "Choose your own ending" storybooks even at the age of 10 so why now at age 19 or more, we lost even the most innate ability to make a choice just as your heart tells you to?

when life gets monotonous...

Yes, I admit for the 1001th that my blog is pretty much dead and very near to the non-existent and even if I really do pop by to blog, there isn't really anything much written, not interesting nor worth taking a second look at (that's provided there was even a first look). Anyway, at this point in time, this lousy laptop of mine is only left with 48% of battery and I have no idea how long this is going to last so I will try to write everything I have fast.

Say, life have been really relax nowadys till the point where I am literally rotting at home waiting for something to happen which up to now I have no idea what. Seriously, if all this time could have been advanced when I was in J2 and radomly popped into my super hectic life then as breaks and holidays, I would have been much more thankful and appreciative of this time instead of wasting it like such now.

Well, if anyone bothers to pop by and reads up to this sentence, you would have realised that I am really crapping and I would have to say I really admire your patience to read on till now, if not I would like t thank you for the wrong trust you put in me for thinking that there might be something better down the post. But then sad to really, I really have nothing to post about.

I am now just filled with all fancicul aims and wishes that I would really love to fufil but I just can never find the ability beyond the few minutes of passion as I think about all my grand plans to do any of the things that I think of. Well so I am ending off this lame post again, because I am typing this with my laptop resting on my lap just as its name suggest it should and sitting cross legged, its not easy to do so for long and my legs are going numb. That's pretty much all till the next time I have the urge to blog again. =)

Oh, My Brain

After being cooped up at home for an awfully long time, doing nothing but just staring at the TV screen, computer screen, novels and sometimes into thin air even hasn't been doing me much good. In fact, I have left my mind wandering about far too much and too much thinking have been done. Yes, too much thinking for an overly active brain like mine that usucally thinks things all the way out of context till we arrive in another planet seriously isn't anything one would call good. To say the truth, its actually pretty disastrous, for a brain like mine, as I have experimented over the years, I only make sound decisions when I refuse to let myself think, which is that I have to take the first decision that comes to mind. If I let my ridicously weird brain work a little more, it will just go on and on and we will never get an answer till we hit like probabaly year 2030. Alright, I admit thats a bit exaggerating, the proud work of my barin as well, but then again, the real situation is not really that far off anyway.

But still, I really do think it has come to a point in time when my brain has to try to function properly and do some staright thinking to resolve this issue at hand. I sahll keep my fingers crossed and hopefully my brain will give me an answer before it goes haywire and reach some unknow planet again. =)